and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Randomize
