"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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