Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize
