Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Randomize
