McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Randomize
