I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
