I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
