My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize
