Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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