so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
Actions speak louder than pants.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
