google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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