Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Randomize
