I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
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