am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
