I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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