the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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