I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
