R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
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