I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Even my vagina gasped.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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