I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize