is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
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