shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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