How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
