Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
