On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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