Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
My butt remains clenched, sir.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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