I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
I smell like Dick and happiness
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
