Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
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