it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
