she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
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