oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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