Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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