He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Randomize