I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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