so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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