She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
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