I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Randomize
