So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I'm eating all of the evidence.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
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