I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
The Olympian is in my bed
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
