I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Randomize
