I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize
