Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I think I just sharted jello shots
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