Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
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