Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
