I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Randomize
