Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize