So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Tumblr User Tells Story About A ‘Demon Gets Adopted By A Grandma’& It Needs To Be A F**king Movie
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.