I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
