Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
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