Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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